7 SIGNS OF HEALTHY COMMUNICATION IN MARRIAGE

 

7 SIGNS OF HEALTHY COMMUNICATION                                                       

                         IN MARRIAGE

Have you ever been in a serious disagreement with your partner, only to discover that the subject of conflict was not as serious as it seemed? Or have you been privileged to counsel a warring couple over seemingly little offenses? Oftentimes, couples disagree, not because they don’t love one another, but because they lack the right communication skills to enhance their relationship. As we take a concise look at the issue of communication between couples, I will like you to weigh the health of your own relationship in the light of the seven signs mentioned in this post.

Firstly, what is communication?

Communication simply means the giving and receiving of information; the way and manner information is passed between the couples on one hand, and with other members of the family. For as long as people are joined together in marriage, communication will always be the thread that holds them. Everything flows from communication. And marriages are either demeaned or edified through communication. Evidently, no relationship can survive in an atmosphere of poor communication.

Why do you need to know these seven signs?

Knowing them will help you to improve your communication skills, and ultimately your marriage. When you make an objective assessment of your marriage, the seven signs will enable you to notice the lapses in your relationship communication methods and channels. And as you begin to apply the suggestions in this post, you will see your marriage improve dramatically.. Please try to watch the video version on YouTube by clicking this link,

The seven signs of healthy communication in marriage include the following;

(1)    The couple has a rich variety of communication methods.

These include the word of mouth (talking), the written word, gestures of the hand and feet, a nod of the head, a wink of the eye, a snap of the finger, a frown of the head, a song, a manner of dressing (silk see-through gown in the evening signifies upcoming romance), a whistle, etc.

A particular attitude can communicate a thousand words. Couples that are rich communicators can use peculiar language to communicate with one another without giving away their secrets to strangers.

 

(2)    There is a total absence of demeaning, derogatory and abusive words in their conversation.

Couples that build and maintain healthy communication never allow the use of uncomplimentary words in their conversation. No curses, or abusive language is allowed in their midst. They go all out to edify one another through their communication. Anytime you hear caustic and sarcastic remarks from couples, it is a sure sign of a breakdown in communication.

(3)    The couples go to great length to LISTEN to one another.

They pay undivided attention to one another’s words. They realize that the secret of being a good communicator is to be a good listener. There is no room for half-listening, selective listening, or listening with the ulterior intention to find lapses in the conversation. Good communicators don’t allow distractions to bridge their communication. They pay rapt attention. Saint Francis of Assisi once said, “O Lord teach me to seek to understand you, before seeking to be understood.”  That statement should be the watchword of every married couple.

 

(4)    The couples observe proper timing and the right atmosphere for communication.

All good communicators understand the need for proper timing and right condition for every communication. They say or do the right thing at the right time. They understand the fact that improper timing in communication can do irreparable damage to the relationship. As a couple, resist the temptation to start a discussion or make demands on your spouse at the wrong time, or present your marital problems to the wrong people, or make sarcastic remarks or costly jokes on your spouse while in public. This is extremely poor communication.

 

(5)    The couples observe truthfulness and transparency at all times.

Couples that enjoy healthy communication don’t allow half-truths or hidden agendas in their communication. They don’t intentionally cover-up a segment of the matter. They understand the obvious dangers inherent in falsehood. Truth told a thousand times remain relevant forever. But every lie told requires more lies to cover it up. Good communicators therefore ensure that their word remains their bond.  And this is a virtue that flows from every conversation.